Loxley Barrett's Day on the River: an outside broadcast to forget

Many, many congratulations to the Loxley Barrett After School Media Club who won the Blue Peter competition to broadcast the Jubilee Pageant live on the BBC yesterday. There were many proud parents on the river bank or at home in front of their TVs. The majority, like the rest of the nation, either held their heads in their hands or stared, open mouthed, as the day unfolded.

We must thank Loxley Barrett's Head of Media, Mr Thompson, who had the inspired idea of making the Jubilee a genuinely inclusive event and handing the coverage over with such disregard for his own reputation.

The children did very well indeed. I heard Tilly Button in the OB truck and she directed proceedings with great authority although her language might even have made a few of the old salts in the Pageant blush. She and all the children excelled themselves in the circumstances. It was difficult not to be overwhelmed by seeing seamen on such a scale.

We're also grateful to Head of Sport Mr Dickinson who stood in at the last minute to provide commentary. We cannot hold it against him that he knew nothing of the antiquities on show. The invitation for this part of proceedings was actually intended for his brother, David.

Good luck today to Jamie Perks who, as part of the same competition, has been given responsibility for the lighting of the Jubilee Beacons (more of a slow burner than yesterday's activities).

Our thoughts are also with Mrs Hebdon-Lloyd who has made a rare appearance at the school and helped the arts and crafts group to make a papier-mâché carriage which will be pulled by Topper and Spearmint in tomorrow's procession. [Actually, if you're listening it will be Josh Archer and a couple of coconut shells, but we don't want to shatter any more illusions.]

And finally we wish Mr Webber and Mr Barlow of the music department every success with this evening's concert. Mr Barlow has blown all the money raised for the school trip at last year's fete. We just hope he has something to show for it.

Loxley Barrett now hand the broadcasting back to the BBC for the rest of the summer. We can only hope they have learned the lessons from this misguided experiment.

If you saw or heard any more about this broadcast, please post it below or direct to @TonysConsultant.