A brief update after a day trip to London:
If you were wondering where Iffy, Alastair, Will, Rhys and the other cricket folk of Ambridge were today, I can reveal that they were enjoying a sneaky day out at the Lord's Test Match. I spotted them clambering out of a Felpersham Minibus Hire* van outside the Grace Gates when I was reporting for duty as on call medic. I think it's fair to say they had enjoyed a beer or two on their way to London courtesy, no doubt, of Kenton, who stumbled off the minibus last, just after Derek Fletcher who, to everyone's surprise, had joined the outing.
It was good of them to bring Tony for the day out, wrapped up warm underneath a travel rug in a wheelchair. Tony was waved through the security check and, once through, the other lads seemed very pleased that whatever was concealed under the rug had made it through with him. I don't think we're talking Tony's lunchbox.
William took a call at one point from Edward and seemed very pleased to - as he put it - have 'thrown him off the scent'. After another drink William appeared to suggest that he knew a little more about the BEAST than he had been letting on. "Let's just say," he said, as he tapped his nose, "that I know an oversized squirrel from a handsaw".
While most of the team scratched their beards (not a sight you want to encounter when most of them are clean shaven) the oblique Shakespearean references continued when Derek Fletcher took a call. He had mistakenly picked up his wife's mobile when leaving home, and when he answered, all he heard was Usha saying: "Now might I do it, Pat" with the sound of Alan praying in the background.
The day was not totally wasted (even though many of the players were.) Iffy thinks he picked up some useful tactical ideas which he will pass on in the nets. Alastair greatly enjoyed the lunchtime display by the children, but that's something he'll be seeing his counsellor about. Kenton was taken aback by the prices in the bars (and was even more pleased at what had been smuggled in under Tony's blanket). Tony himself failed his audition to take over the public address system and Rhys felt completely out of his depth.
Only time will tell if the trip will pay dividends for the cricket team. Watch this space.
* Other hire companies are available.